What, you cycled how far?

During the cold and wet winter months I’m not asked much about cycling, I assume my friends and colleagues find the thought of braving the elements unattractive. Now that it’s nearly summer, and there is more interest in spending time outdoors, they are more inquisitive.

10 things non-cycling friends, family or colleagues have asked ,or said, to me…

They say: You cycled how far?
I think: It was 102kms, I better say it in miles rather than kms, or they’ll think I’m trying to make it sound further or showing off.
I say: About 60miles.

They say: All in one day?
I think: Of course I did it all in one day, infact I was back by noon, as I wanted to go to Selfridges in the afternoon.
I say: Yeh.

They say: Can you cycle with no hands?
I think: I can cycle with no hands one at a time, I’m perfectly capable of indicating, why are they asking me that, is it a measure of how good or bad a cyclist I am?
I say: Not really.

They say: Does the Mechanic shave his legs?
I think: No he waxes them, but I don’t suppose they are asking me what method he uses.
I say: Yeh, but we don’t share shaving tips.

They say ( a friend of the Mechanic): Does he polish his legs, why are they so shiny?
I think: He’s got a point, why are they so shiny? I wish my legs looked as good.
I say: Dunno.

They say: Do you wear all the gear, and have those clippy shoes?
I think: Oh no, they’re visualising me in lycra.
I say: Yep.

They say: How can a saddle that skinny be comfortable?
I think: I love my saddle, I have the same one on both bikes, I even went through the humiliation of having my rear measured by the young chap at Sigma Sport, to get the perfect saddle.
I say: You get used to it.

They say: You’re obsessed with cycling.
I think: Am I? No I’m not. I love cycling, and I cycle most weekends, but its not as if I have to get up in the night for a cycling fix.
I say: Nothing, I don’t know how to reply to this, probably just shrug my shoulders.

They say: What do you do when you get there?
I think: There isn’t a there, I cycle to cycle, the whole ride is my ‘there’.
I say: Have a cup of coffee.

They say: You must be super fit?
I think: I wish I was.
I say: Well, fitter than if I didn’t cycle.

5 thoughts on “What, you cycled how far?

  1. Very amusing. When I get told, “you’re obsessed/crazy!” (I’m not) my reply? “I prefer to call it dedicated” (I am also not this). I like your answer so thinking of amalgamating the 2 next time: “if I was obsessed, I’d get up in the middle of the night to get my fix; no, I’m just dedicated”.

    Liked by 1 person

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